Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize
