im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize