but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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