Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
