Do vagina's smell?
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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