he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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