bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
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