I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
