Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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