Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
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