4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
