For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
