I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
