we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
These tits shall not be calmed
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
