i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
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