Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
