3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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