I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
