After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
