I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize