Don't make out with my wife yet
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize