my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
false alarm. still invincible.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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