He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
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Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
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By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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