How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I DEMAND FORESKIN
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
