We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
