Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Apple has a Lot to Explain to iPhone X Customers
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
People Asked The Internet Questions About their Private Parts And The Results Are Hilarious
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...