I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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