scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Text me some of your sweat
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
