i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
this hospital has no fireball
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
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