We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
