i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
