I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
