There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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