No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
