I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
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