he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
