Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
