Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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