When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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