Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
