I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
