this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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