Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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