Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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