Whod you bang
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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