maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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