What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
