Your tits are I can't wait for
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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