only if we run a train.
done.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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