Rock
Scissors
Fuck
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
